The Path – Goals – Do you dream of paths diverging in a yellow wood? Checklists? Maps? Are you talking to yourself as you follow your routine? What IS your routine? How has your routine evolved? What efforts have you made to change it to newly perceived needs and discoveries? Or is your routine formed outside you, for the benefit of others?
If You Have No Goal, Any Path Will Take You There – But you won’t like where you end up. Besides, you DO have a goal, (at least one) especially since that last epiphany. Sometimes it’s something as simple as “stopping the pain” or “staying healthy.” As you become more adept at change, you realize dividing effort into “steps” to achieve a goal is critical. Take weight loss: the intimidating goal of losing 50 pounds. That won’t happen fast. Your conscious, subconscious, unconscious and collective unconscious (not to mention your pre-conscious!) are going to kick up a helluva fuss. YOU WILL CHANGE. That’s guaranteed. Studying the history of human weight loss attempts if you are not ready for the psychic pushback your body will actually double down and accelerate its weight gain. The same thing happens with alcoholism and drug addiction – trying to “control “ it often drives the supplicant deeper into their disease in a panicked reaction to the “loss” of supply. Challenge – But you can be ready. This is nothing more than the sore-muscled athlete, Day 2, thinking, I CAN’T DO THIS. Guess what? EVERYBODY THINKS THAT! Expect it! You treat yourself with loving compassion and cold compresses, hot baths and massage. In other words, there is an established map, a way to GETH THROUGH THIS. The challenge is to apply such a map to yourself, and then TAILOR and CUSTOMIZE it to your goals. Danger – Don’t go it alone. A side effect of “lessening supply” is “crazy thinking.” You will hear yourself say things like, “Nobody cares about me so I’ll just drink myself to death” Or “I WANT TO DISAPPEAR INTO THIS VAT OF ICE CREAM.” We all need somebody to talk us off the ledge, somebody who is familiar with not just our goals but what we are going through. Your id is holding the rest of you hostage, and you need an experienced hostage negotiator. So, don’t try making it through this crisis without a buddy AND a coach. AA has an acronym – HALT representing: Hungry Angry Lonely Tired These are the emotion states in which you make Bad Decisions. So when you see this condition developing – Halt. Call your hostage negotiator immediately.
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In TantricTarot, the Dawn card signals a slackening of tension. We were all keyed up – now we are going to get a break. Often this can be interpreted as a Reward – finally! Some little crumb to keep us going. When we have been trying so hard and suddenly we relax, it’s almost as if a sense of shock sets in. We’re so exhausted from all our effort we can’t possibly figure out what’s REALLY going on. We just want to roll with it, for now. Get our breath back. We are plunged into an almost dream-like state of particular value to Skryers hoping to Discern their future: Day Dreaming. As we allow ourselves to relax, we are flooded with images, ideas, memories, yearnings, seemingly disconnected at first. Go with it. What is this saying to you? How do you feel about it? It is in moments like these that we may discover that the high-status Soulmate we THOUGHT we wanted (Financial bro! Super-model! Sports star!)is not what we want AT ALL but someone more in tune with our cherished lifestyle and our secret sense of self. As dawn breaks, the game re-sets. We get to start again! Allow yourself to celebrate all the fresh possibilities suddenly poured so generously into your lap. Sex Cadets I shall orchestrate your life I say Make your blood sing woodwind Stretch my nerve harp-tight Across your exo-shell While you, heart racer Put me through my paces Pushing your muscle through The gates of my life Pushing past theories of the pluperfect poetical pushing like a downhill artist the speed racer you claimed to be Speed devil Speed demon Speed dreamer. |
Alysse AallynAlysse Aallyn is a poet who sees tarot as a key to accessing the unconscious. She is the author of four well-received thrillers, Find Courtney, Depraved Heart, Woman Into Wolf and I’ll Sleep When You’re Dead, one historical novel (Devlyn) and a book of short stories (Awake Till the End.) She has three published books of poetry – The Sacred Quiver, TheHot Skin and The Five Wounds and edited another (The Feathered Violin.) She trained in theatre at Circle in the Square Theatre School and Martha Graham School of Dance. She appeared in the part of Isabella in Jean Giraudoux’s The Enchanted at the New Yorker Theatre. She has held writing fellowships at Brooklyn College and LaSalle University. Her novel Depraved Heart won a 2011 CT Press Club fiction award and her play Queen of Swords was a semi-finalist in the 2014 National Arts Council First Play award. She has been invited to read her original work at The Folger Shakespeare Library in Washington, DC and has taught creative writing at Catonsville Community College. Woman Into Wolf was a semi-finalist for The National Playwrights Conference (2016) and her play Our Father’s Restaurant was performed on Pacifica Radio. She has also appeared as a crime commentator on ID - TV’s Blood Relatives.Her play, Let’s Speak Vietnamese was published in Dramatika Magazine. She directed The Maids for Theatre Upstairs in Columbia, Maryland. Other plays she’s written are The Honey & the Pang about Emily Dickinson’s posthumous career, Cuck’d– a modern Othello, and Caving, in which the theatre is transformed into a cave for a spelunking dare. Rough Sleep, (based on her novel I’ll Sleep When You’re Dead) was produced by Manhattan Repertory Theatre (W. 45thSt) in 2019. Her latest play, The Dalingridge Horror, (short version Leonard & Virginia) explores the partnership between Leonard & Virginia Woolf in their own words and was a finalist for the Tennessee Williams 2021 award. Her newest poetry collection, Haunted Wedding will be appearing in 2022 from Thriller Library. Archives
September 2022
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